She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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