omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize