Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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