yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
the quote on the bathroom wall was "stop reading this and focus on peeing" and i realized i'd peed on the seat.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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