No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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