Yo dont text me then not text me
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
