Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize
