your thong is hanging out like whoa
i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Randomize
