The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
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