I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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