reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
