32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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