There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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