So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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