I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
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