He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Randomize
