it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize