somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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