even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
