I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Randomize