Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
