apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I hope mine doesn't look like that
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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