I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
