Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
what is it with giant penises always finding me
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
