Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
