I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
Randomize
