It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize
