so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
i used baking grease as lip gloss
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Randomize
