that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i think my mom watched the whole time
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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