the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
