im gay
i know
yea but for you.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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