my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
