i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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