There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
