CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
