i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
