would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
Randomize
