you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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