we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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