So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
You pole danced in your parka.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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