Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize