try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
Randomize
