I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
Randomize
