you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
sarcasm needs its own font
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
