just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Randomize