i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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