Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
