So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
