she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Randomize
