I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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